It is tempting to think of this first part of our mentoring journey, Story, as just a warm-up to the real work of mentoring. I want to encourage you to think differently, to view this beginning as a precious opportunity. Rarely in our culture do we take the unrushed time to tell the deeper story of our life. Rarely do we slow down enough to hear the more subtle reflections that make up another person. This is that opportunity – a chance to slow down and talk and listen.
Even further, this Story telling-time is an opportunity to reflect. Becoming a reflective person is an essential ingredient for consistent growth. As we reflect, we become aware of what is working in our lives and what is not working, what has shaped us, and what we might change that can alter the trajectory of our life. Our time together through this year will call us to reflect regularly, and in reflecting, we will learn to listen to God whispering to us.
If I were to encourage each group in some form as we start this walk together, it would be to go slow, take your time. How you enter this beginning time together will set the stage for how you go through the later stages. Will you be open about the real events that have shaped you; the hard, the painful, the blessings and the beautiful? Will you quiet the other seemingly urgent voices of the day and listen to someone else speak? The insights from this time set the foundation for the rest of the year. The fruit from real listening will continue to ripen based on how we begin here.
So, don’t view this time as just a necessary “getting to know you time.” View this as a sacred offering to each other, mentor to mentee, mentee to mentee, and mentee to mentor. Invest yourself wholly in this time. This is where we begin to learn to hear one another and to hear God in this journey.
Questions:
- What are the three to four events or circumstances that have most shaped your life?
- What is your faith story?
- Is it hard for you to slow down and simply listen?
How does it feel to you to tell your story?
Over the years of doing this with teens and 20-somethings, I have been fortunate to write down a “List of 100 questions” that I have used. Now, their are actually only 89 but it’s a work in progress. Several of those start with “tell me….” . One that I find useful is “what do you really like about yourself?”
Really like the “go slow” approach that Tommy wrote about
Thanks Mac! I think that is a great idea to develop a list of questions. How great if we could begin to think, “first, ask a question, then respond.”