What is Your Why

What is Your Why

Links Lesson: Name Your Why

I genuinely enjoy playing golf with people at all different skill levels. If my playing partner shoots 120 but is having fun, trying to play better, understands basic golf etiquette, then I have fun also. What frustrates me is to play with someone who has forgotten their “why.” That person, usually a male, claims they play for fun but will typically lose their temper easily, expecting to play like a pro, even though they never practice. I hear stories from them of how long it takes to get over the poor round. I kind of wonder why they play if the game so consistently makes them miserable.

Often, I think the answer is as simple as identifying with clarity the “Why.” Why do you play the game? The answer may not be as simple as it would seem. Those who claim they play to have fun too often seem to be the last ones laughing. They seem to only enjoy the game when it comes with a lifetime best round. Some people grind for the lowest handicap, never satisfied their game. Of course, we have all played with the club competitor who can’t stand to lose and somehow miraculously always shoots below their handicap when it counts. Golf, too often, brings out our worst. To be honest, I fall victim to the same problem. Off the course, I am a picture of composure. On the course, a chunked chip may turn ugly.

The reason that knowing your why is so important is because it exposes all of the other imposters. Experts in counterfeit currency spend their time studying the real currency in detail so that when confronted with a fake, it stands out like a sore thumb. So it should be with golf. If I know my “why” with crystal clarity, then I know when I am allowing lesser priorities to dominate my thinking. Knowing my “why” has helped me adjust my perspective mid-round when a few bad swings or unfair bounces threatened to derail me.

Ideas for Helpful Whys:

• To unwind from the stresses of life

• To enjoy the fellowship of others

• To embrace the challenge of physical, mental, and emotional mastery

• To master my emotions

• To learn to compete at the highest level and still have fun

  Life Lesson: Your Why is your filter and your North Star

Knowing and giving regular attention to your Life Why will change your trajectory, guaranteed. Decisions become clearer. Values rise to the surface. When I precisely know my Why, I know when to say Yes, and as importantly, when to say No. I align my life with my Why as much as current circumstances allow. As a life coach, I have seen too many people, men and women, pursue the highest salary or most impressive title (nothing wrong with either of those) when those are clearly secondary to their deepest desires. Lack of clarity results in chasing what everyone else tells us we should chase. Living a life of clear purpose takes boldness and courage. It takes hard work and necessitates brave choices. Even the act of trying to identify purpose takes incredible resolve. It is much easier to live reactively and impulsively.

What is your Why? Do you have it written down? Do you review it regularly? Is your job aligned with your Why? Do your relationships reflect your Why? If you were to live your life aligned with your Why, what would need to change?

Watching someone play a round of golf unaware of their Why in golf is frustrating and a tragedy. This pails next to seeing someone waste precious years plodding in mediocrity because they have never done the work to identify what matters to them and oriented their life accordingly.

Knowing your Why will improve your golf game and your life.